Attraversiamo

I had my fortune told a few days ago just like I had many times in the past. I would be successful, I would accumulate wealth but more often times than not, I would falter on the romantic aspect – I have heard all that before… This time, I was told that I have suffered heartbreak and failed relationships but this last time I should gamble. Gamble… Gamble on the two kids, a boy and a girl and a very compatible relationship on a man that would not disappoint me and hurt me just like the others did in the past. 

All the while, while I was being told these things… I was thinking of you, of him… As much as I tried denying to myself that I was thinking of you…

This may sound shallow, but it really affected me when Justin Timberlake married Jessica Biel. I felt happy for my childhood crush especially when he said that he was marrying his best friend. He made that statement and I felt that I wanted the same for myself. If the same thing happens to me, then I don’t need to put my best foot forward or pretend that I am ladylike, cute and a good homemaker because I am not all that. I don’t know how to fry an egg or work a microwave even if it cost me my life. I like playing Play Station games, I smoke weed and drink more than an average jock’s share of alcohol – I am nothing prissy or ladylike. I hate butterflies, ribbons and I don’t doodle flowers on my notebooks. None of that shit. I could be too bold, opinionated and argumentative it could get into the hairs of people. I won’t drone on about myself here. To cut it short, I am an acquired taste. Ending up with someone who knows me well would be my best bet.

And all along, after swimming in the vast sea of men and ending up covered in scum and seaweeds… There you are…

So if you have read or watched Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat Pray Love, I have been done with the Eat part as proven by the pounds I gained last year, I am done with Pray when I reassessed my life, traveled alone and dedicated my time to worthy pursuits… Here I am at the Love part… 

As you travel the world and I envy you as I subsist in my sedentary scholarly pursuits, I’m just here waiting my darling… What is the few years we have building the foundations of our future for the greater number of years we spent being friends… I fear the thought of it and laying it out in the open, but maybe this is “attraversiamo”…

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LATE NIGHT SCRAMBLED EGGS

LATE NIGHT SCRAMBLED EGGS

By: Maan “Maggie” Villar, The World According to Maggie V

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The cliché that “the best things in life are free” must have surfaced from a general nodding of heads from people who have been in love or have experienced love. In my experience, it was him suddenly lying on my lap one lazy afternoon with just a book and a fruit shake in hand at Ayala Triangle. We had light conversations in between his naps and my reading, the feeling that those conversations gave me was the same feeling you get when you are used to eating burgers and red meat and you suddenly shift your diet to vegetable salads and sliced fruits. We sat on that spot until the moon was gazing at the world with lazy eyes, hesitant to leave its spot but itching to end its shift like a perfume sales man on a slow day or a prisoner guard. That day, the jokes we shared about couples in Luneta Park or Manila Bay became ubiquitous, we understood them all of a sudden because we were in the moment – we were in their shoes, in their state of mind. What happened that afternoon gave me an illusion and hope that maybe I could spend the last of my years with this man, on an old porch, sitting on a rocking chair, white hair, thick glasses, a large floral dress and a knitting project in my hands.

 

Recent developments made it clear that those romantic misgivings were indeed illusions and false hopes. Only the both of us hold the secrets of our affair and its demise, I always say our love grew in cunning, in silence and in quiet. As much as I would have wanted to share our story in full animation and gusto, I cannot bring myself to do that. My mind and heart trails to lucid moments of torrid kissing and tight grabs of once unknown places in my body that I am left in a resigned mood, left to the overwhelming gush of longing those passionate moments bring — those once unknown places in my body that became the territory of his hands and postmarked by the sweet juice of his kisses. I hug myself at the memory. I had to pause my writing this hug myself at the thought…

 

The thoughts of him bring vivid sensory recollections. I can still feel the reverberation of his voice in my ears when he tries to make a point, or the sound of his soft snoring wand heavy breathing after a tiring day. His eyes, seductive and expressive, sheds a fine light when he is engrossed in what he is reading or when we enjoy a morning stroll and the first rays of sun passes through it in a diagonal fashion. His eyes were the color of grape seeds; they were always teary and sad, like newly varnished mahogany. The deep pools of brown in his eyes came out even more when he wears his black scarf, he wears that scarf and he looks so regal and feels cozier to hug. His hugs say a lot about his feelings, most of the time it makes me feel like a starfish being taken to deeper seas by a big wave, a brainless starfish not knowing what to do. That feeling of engulfment is eased when I feel the details of his thumb mark on my cheek and all worries and woes melt into a blur – as if the world is so simple and nothing can ever hurt me. I miss the mossy smell of his apartment and the very distinct manly smell which sticks to his bed that I keep whiffing off his pillows and sheets when he is away, sometimes even when he is just taking a shower. I randomly get a whiff of his Issey Miyake perfume when walking at a mall or the streets and that is when I badly miss him, that is the height of my sadness and I feel all of a sudden that the buildings or the crowd would eat me a live – very nauseating, my legs throb and weaken and feel like it is giving away.

 

That same crowd that used to double over when we walk the streets, that gave a slight smile when overhearing our little arguments or funny takes on random things over dinner or drinks, that same crowd that stared when he pulled me in for a kiss good-bye and that followed me with its eyes on mornings when I have just emerged from his place with my hair in a rut and in man clothes – the crowd that gave justice to walking the walk of shame in those mornings.

 

His place, his apartment is the backdrop to the memories we have created together. That dingy old apartment: where quiz papers from fourth grade with perfect scores and smileys in red ink are scattered along laced panties and used condoms. A wooden ashtray that fills up as the night deepens and the morning enters, dusty books with frail pages seemingly salvaged and dried from a rainy day and an un-stringed Fender acoustic guitar that sits on its corner were a few of its remarkable features. His place was my refuge from storms and graying skies complete with hot chocolate and slow rainy day sex, my secret place for watching movies and fucked up documentaries that cause my impatience to go home from the office, his place was the breeding ground for our love and eventual pains with its four walls privy to our whispers. The same four walls banged by neighbors when we have raucous sex, the same four walls that are stained black from his cooking.

 

I lie about not eating scrambled eggs ever. I ate scrambled eggs because it reminds me of post-coital breakfast food he cooks deep in the night. It was cooked to perfection, a little milk and just enough salt that it turns out fluffy and tasting exactly the way I want it to taste.

 

Late night scrambled eggs that have been demoted to late night scrambled thoughts…

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SEA AND SILENCE

SEA AND SILENCE
By Maan “Maggie” Villar, The World According to Maggie V

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It has been a long time since I have written but I trusted that the knack for it would come eventually. I have traveled quite a lot the past two months, a lot in my standards as I am a corporate rat and a miser working towards a dream. It has put my soul to rest, hence the silence of my thoughts and the purification of my soul’s unknown turbulence.

I would like to tell you of a ride in a boat with four friends. I was expecting cajoling and loud conversation as we embarked on that short trip towards the opposite island…

The conversation hushed gradually as we went further and deeper down the edges of the Pacific Ocean with only the sound of the friction of the boat against the water, its motor and the wind. And then, as the water turned from a light shade of blue green to a deep blue, hard to distinguish from black… Everyone was left to their contemplative moods and dreams…

It was beautiful seeing the peace in my friends’ faces as we fathomed the depth of the ocean and how our lives were at actual risk being there… That anytime a big wave could approach and set our boat and its passengers to the bottom of the ocean, lifeless and peacefully floating, and that the most painful kind of death is from drowning…

All the while I thought of life, love, dreams, sea, travel and the beauty that remains undiscovered in the country… I want badly to bring the person I would truly love to this island paradise and experience the silence of the boat ride with him. I stared at the lone lighthouse on an outlying island and had fantasies of going atop it when I visit the place again. At the fast paced lifestyles everyone else is busied with, it is imperative to put the camera down and relish the experience, it is much different captured artificially than when you are there at the moment.

The longest thought that occupied my mind was the realization that the greatest artists, poets and thinkers of then and now must have been inspired by the sea and by lost paradises; and I think that maybe one would not fathom the depth in black and white unless they see the sun reflected at the deepest pockets of the ocean…

 

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TRAVEL YOUNG, TRAVEL NOW

TRAVEL YOUNG, TRAVEL NOW
By Maan “Maggie” Villar, The World According to Maggie V

A new friend from work, Camille, has shared to me a blog article that really changed my mind about postponing travel plans and my whole idea of “delayed gratification” (i.e. exchanging time for leisure studying for my masters and law school, putting in extra hours at work and sweating it out at the gym). It was a simple blog article called “Three Reasons to Travel While Your Young” written by Jeff Goins (http://goinswriter.com/travel-young/). I was moved because he was right, I had many excuses and “buts” to put off travelling and sucking at the bone marrow of life. To quote:

‘“Yeah, but…” is pernicious. Because it makes it sound like we have the best of intentions when really we are just too scared to do what we should. It allows us to be cowards, while sounding noble.’

I did sound noble in forsaking leisure for putting time, effort and money for future plans but I decided it was time for me to loosen up – I’m too wound up to absorb things the way I did in the past anyway. What struck me the most is that Jeff Goins furthered his point by saying that most of the people who like myself “waited” to travel the world NEVER DID. And I would not want that to happen. I want to ACTUALLY LIVE LIFE and not just be on the sidelines, a mere spectator, I want to REALLY SUCK ON THE BONE MARROW OF LIFE and BE IN ALL ITS ACTION.

Since I have a good income in my new work and they are democratic enough to allow working from home and flexi-time, I figured that YES, IT IS TIME.

Contrary to what you are thinking, I would not want to travel to other countries just yet. No, not because I don’t have enough resources or I’m a coward the reason is that on my first day in college, HISTORY 101, I took away a very important lesson… My professor, Mrs. Segundo (who also happens to be the mother of one of my good friends), told the class that she feels that IT WOULD BE HYPOCRITICAL TO KNOW OTHER COUNTRIES WITHOUT FIRST KNOWING YOUR OWN. She says SHE FEELS BAD FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO GO OUT IN THE WORLD WITHOUT EVEN STEPPING ON THE SOILS OF VISAYAS AND MINDANAO.

God, she was so right.

The plan is that I would read up on Philippine history before the travelling begins and some Nick Joaquin, Conrado de Quiros and Jessica Zafra books on the side, also some coffee table editions on Philippine art just so I get an overall feel and re-acquaintance to my own land and its story. Also, I plan to travel ALONE, because I know how much I take studying the art and artifacts inside museums and how weird it is that I like sitting down at park benches eating ice cream and reading a good old book by Hemingway or poems by Tagore. (I don’t know why but Ernest Hemingway books are so good to read when travelling) I also stroll for hours in markets, parks and bazaars watching the people and observing the products and actual economic activity. Not everyone is amenable to my methods in getting to know and feel the place.

Here’s the list of the places I would be visiting for 2014. (I made sure I step on the lands of Visayas and Mindanao hopefully there would be airline discounts that would come up.) I would definitely be blogging about these trips and it would be a GREAT PERSONAL ACHIEVEMENT if I tick off every destination off of my list. Wish me luck!

vigan

JANUARY – VIGAN, ILOCOS SUR
–           I always planned a trip to Vigan and even bought a map to the city a few years ago, but the trip never came into fruition for stupid excuses here and there. I feel connected to the old world, colonial vibe of Vigan, its calesas, cobblestone paths and mostly its museums.

clark

FEBRUARY – CLARK FREEPORT ZONE, PAMPANGA
–           The real agenda is to take part in the four-day Hot Air Balloon Festival which would be held from Thursday to Sunday on February 6 to 9 or February 13 to 16 next year. An excerpt from one travel website: “The hot air balloon festival features the best and most well designed hot air balloons you will not see anywhere else. As this event is participated in by different countries, they also bring in hundreds of balloon pilots.

sagada

MARCH – SAGADA, MOUNTAIN PROVINCE
–           I remember my parents taking me to Sagada when I was younger, I had a Sony compact disc player and Lord of the Rings to accompany me through that long bus ride. I also recall my legs being sore from trekking those mountains and spelunking inside the beautiful caves. I had my map and Hello Kitty film camera in hand throughout the trip. The place still allures me, its mysterious beauty beckons me to go back, walk through its mountain paths and eat homemade yogurt in the morning.

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APRIL – BICOL

–           Another thing I always put off was boarding the PNR train which is a mystery to most Manilenos and Manilenas because as one friend puts it “no one rides that dingy train anymore.” Another friend said that the interior of the train has already improved and that it is a 4-hour trip that he thinks I would like because according to him I’m the “buses and trains kind of girl.” Top on my list would be to visit the perfectly shaped Mayon volcano and Cagsawa national museum, of course I would taste the spicy dishes Bicol prides itself in.

pagudpud

MAY – PAGUDPUD, ILOCOS NORTE

–           I cannot let summer pass by without visiting a beach, I was initially planning to splurge on the beach because everyone knows I’m not really a “beach-bum type” which is why I want to make it worth the while and all the gym time I’d be investing on for a flatter stomach. But upon researching on my travel destinations, I fell in love immediately with Pagudpud. The CNN travel website describes it this way: “the wide and inviting beaches are usually empty, making them ideal for those who enjoy mixing solitude with sun, sand and surf.”

tagaytay

JUNE – TAGAYTAY CITY, CAVITE

–           My parents usually took me to Tagaytay as a little girl and I never forgot those moments when my mom and I had the cable car rides and when she directed me how to pose for pictures. I’m expecting June to be a busy month since I am to start law school and probably arrange for my post-graduate graduation so Tagaytay came up since it’s nearby and would not hurt my budget. Top things to do would be to visit Taal Volcano, Sonya’s Garden, and get lost in time drawing and listening to Elgar Concertos while at the Picnic Grove.

laguna

JULY – LAGUNA

–          The birthplace of Dr. Jose Rizal, our national hero, I just feel like I need to know the place to also know the hero. The course on Rizal back in my undergraduate years, the three text books I read on him and topping my Rizal class was not enough. Top on my list would be Pagsanjan Falls, Caliraya Lake, the Rizal house, the old churches and if time permits probably another flashback of my childhood in Enchanted Kingdom.

batangas

AUGUST – BATANGAS

–          This trip is another channeling to my childhood, I remember riding the “balanga” or floating house with my family and holding on to the kawayan as I try floating around the deeper parts of the beach. Since I’m travelling alone, I would most likely forego the beaches and visit the Calatagan Lighthouse, the old churches and eat Lomi and Bulalo which are the signature dishes of Batangas. Probably stop by houses of friends, I happen to have a number of close friends who are Batangenos and Batangenas. My bestfriend Cyrus is a Batangeno and promised to take me around, fingers crossed that my accommodations would be free.

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SEPTEMBER – Iloilo

–          To pay homage to my roots, I plan to visit Iloilo and my mother’s hometown. To know the most amazing person in the world, my mom, I would do it Rizal style, know the place where the person grew up in to know the person better. Hoping to score discounted airline tickets and free accommodations from relatives in the province. Top things that I would want to do in the city would be to go to Diversion Road and have a taste of the Iloilo night life (probably meet a ‘malambing’ hottie while sipping on pink cosmopolitans), visit Fort San Pedro which is said to have ‘the most beautiful sunset’ in the city, and go to the Miag-ao Fortress Church listed as a UNESCO World Heritage site. September 10th would be my mom’s birthday, this is the perfect homage to her awesome-ness.

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OCTOBER – Bacolod

–          The Masskara Festival of Bacolod falls on the closest weekend of October 19, I surely would not want to miss that and the chance to buy boxes of pastel and no, the pastels are not for sharing but for personal consumption (and yes, I might end up a diabetic when I’m back from the trip). Our family also owns a couple of businesses in the business district so I might as well acquaint myself with the city while I’m at it. Aside from taking part in the Masskara Festival and visiting our businesses, I would love to visit the Talisay Ruins which is heralded as one of the most fascinating ruins in the world, explore Silay City which is considered the ‘seat of arts, culture and eco-tourism in Western Visayas and visit San Sebastian Cathedral and Pope John Paul II Tower.

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NOVEMBER– Camiguin

–          I watched a local movie with this title, I have a vague memory of it but I think that movie was X-rated and Gelie De Belen starred in it. That movie sparked wishes of going to the place and grand imaginings of how it would be like, waterfalls, beaches and island mystery. Many have been in awe of the “virginal” beauty of Camiguin and it is called ‘The Island Born of Fire’ because of the active and dormant volcanoes that surround the island. October would probably the end of the school term for law school and I’m expecting to get vacation time from work so I might as well hit the beach, smoke a joint or two every night and sleep under the stars and the sound of sea waves.

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DECEMBER – Batanes

–          I placed Batanes last on the list because having researched on my 12 destinations, Batanes would entail extra budgeting and preparation. Batanes would cap off year 2014 because it is indeed a dream destination. I would love to visit the Ivatan stone houses, visit World War II memorials, visit the museums that I’ve heard they have in Batanes and walk through the virgin hills and the lighthouses. (What is it with me and places with lighthouses? Maybe it is a sign that I will find “myself” in this year of travel) I actually posted four pictures of Batanes, it is just so beautiful.

A BRIEF RESPONSE

I read your blog and I am overwhelmed with emotions for the first time this year, you said you missed the vision of me in your couch when I have only you white shirt on. I miss being that vision too, I felt my most beautiful, being in just your loose white shirts, smelling of laundry detergent and mothballs. I made a choice that day, I chose him over you and ended up with no one. And years after our brief dalliances, you still inspire most of what I write. Just like you, I put up this blog because I know it is one of the ways to reach you. Reason and reality over wishful thinking, it is only a sliver of hope that we still share tomorrow together. But before I sleep at night, before I am rocked away by the delirium of sleepiness, I feel our connection. I feel that I know the goings-on in your mind, what you are feeling and thinking at that exact moment. Sometimes, I wonder how many women have shared your bed and if you too think of me while you find a temporary cure for your lone. For now, the past would be the glue that binds our like minds and hearts, a reason to believe that in the vast spectrum of eternity a vagabond and a minstrel were once destined. I miss your laughter and wise eyes…

But, if you say you miss me like you say you do, you should be willing to put it through the true test:

When you walk on a beach or when you witness a magnificent natural phenomena like the sunrise or the warm tones on the sky when the sun is about to set, close your eyes and feel your heart… If you feel that you want me to be beside you holding your hand as you walk through the shores or sit on the sand, if you want to whisper dreams and sweet nothings under the sheath of stars in the night sky, if you think of me when the sun rises in the morning… that means you truly miss me… You miss me if you think of me at the most beautiful moments and at the saddest ones.

Closer

Corinne Bailey Rae is definitely one of my favorite artists, I mean, in my ideal version of the world I would marry her off to John Legend. This performance is smooth and perfect – you have to listen to how clear all the instrumentals are and how Corinne Bailey Rae actually felt her song and emanated the emotion of it as she felt the air with her arms and hands. It was beautiful. If you download the digital version it is just as clear, if they could make a live performance sound this good then the world would be a better place. Great song, great performance, great back-up instrumentals and great voice!

An Untitled Love Poem

AN UNTITLED LOVE POEM

By: Maan “Maggie” Villar, The World According to Maggie V

 

– My good friend L found this love poem somewhere in the nooks and crannies of their house, it is an old poem I wrote dated April 17, 2011… Go figure… Man’s words are really sweetened by love and here is firsthand evidence…

 

Still enthralled with each stride you take as you enter

A crowded room,

You are a vision:

You wake me up from the drone

Of cigarette smoke,

Of vague chatter,

Of colored lights,

And,

Of melodious rhythms.

How do you do your magic?

Of stopping time as each hand of the clock tick to the next second,

Of calming the fire of passion in my nerves with a single touch,

Consoling a broken heart with just a peck on the cheek,

Of muting noise and sound,

And of tugging heartstrings of a heart embittered, cold and frozen

Warming it in your palms

Melting the thick clumps of ice

Mending unknown wounds

Making it love

Unconditionally…

Love has gathered up

Pent up

Underneath the crevasses of a heart

Not meaning to do so

Not believing it will

But it did…

You made it do so.

Like I said

You did magic,

You are magic.

A miracle, almost.

I want all of it not to become a memory

Because memories fade

And we look for what was

When those memories are beautiful ones

I want us to last.

One day at a time

Each fond moment unraveling at its pace.

Democritus said that

“Everything came from nothing”

It relates to us

“Who would have known?”

We were two lone strangers

Empty.

Broken.

But it happened…

I’m glad it did.

Dreaming and hoping to spend the rest of my days with you,

Of watching our tresses turn ivory together

The laughter of grandchildren in our lawn

Conversations on a fireplace over home-cooked dinner

Breakfasts lit by the majestic sunrise of each morning

Rainy days cozying up to slow soulful jazz saxophone…

Always I would fancy

Having that turn in my stomach

The stoppage in my breathing

The lightness of feeling

AS if I metamorphosed into a firefly’s diaphanous wing

Every time you walk in the room…

I cannot imagine life with another nor the same musings

because of another man.

I guess you got me,

And I LOVE YOU for doing so.

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MISTY

MISTY
By: Maan “Maggie” Villar, The World According to Maggie Villar
Friday, June 21, 2013

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This is probably the last time that I would write about you and the false hopes that I still bear, I’m not certain if it is the last time and if I would hold on to the past still but I have always been a romantic, a fool, and a dreamer. See, I was watching “Silver Linings Playbook” for the second time this month, it has been raining quite hard in the city that I felt the need to stay at home and draw the blue curtains of my room down, and channel whatever life changing occurrence it was that led me to right here and right now. That scene in the movie (starts at 1:49:49) really struck a chord in me, not only because an antiquated Johnny Mathis song, “Misty”, was playing but because I related the scene so much to what happened in my life. To be more specific, to how we really ended it all. And just as a scene from a movie or real life, an imagined character and setting, a good song and beauty and the imitation of life to art or vice versa inspires me to write, right now I want to write about how we ended because no one really knew, none of my friends heard about the real story, it’s just the same tasteless answers I give them to invoke no further questioning or I divert to another topic that would take the better of their interest.

That scene in Silver Linings would take a spot in my most favorite movie scenes, probably outmaneuvering that one in 27 Dresses when Katherine Heigl dances with her beau under the stars on that yacht while “Like a Star” (Performed by: Corinn Bailey Rae) was playing on the background or that scene in Notting Hill inside the movie theatre right after Hugh Grant finds that Julia Roberts is with another man in the hotel and that old lonely song plays as he watches a movie starring her muse. The understated allusions to love they are and how no matter the differences it has with your own story, you still find parallelisms.

How it happened was a celebration of victory, Tiffany and Pat celebrating a 5.0 they won at a sport-dancing competition they joined and a parlay between Pat’s father and a friend. Everyone was ecstatic, Tiff jumps up to Pat, probably about to give him a kiss and you can feel Tiff’s longing, how she wanted to lock life to that scene just holding Pat and everyone close to them, family and friends around them in a circle all smiles and happy, victorious. And then Pat finds his wife (who cheated on him with a co-worker and gave him the necessary trauma to render time in a mental institution and a restraining order), and everything around him probably dissipated into a blur and he walked up to her and Tiff just looks on with so much sadness in her eyes. Tiff then runs away in her black trench coat and puts on a shoe on the streets, she runs away, just runs away.

I’ll stop the scene on that scene in the streets with Tiffany running away because I believe only in realized dreams but not in romantic happy endings anymore, similar to how the movie ended. Maybe, since this is the last time, it’s about time that I stop explaining myself and time that you understand why Woody Allen compartmentalizes my views on love in the movies he has written and why that scene in Silver Linings is something I can relate to so much. It’s up to you what silver lining we could glean from how we ended.

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Look at me
I’m as helpless as a kitten up a tree
And I feel like I’m clinging to a cloud
I can’t understand
I get misty, just holding your handWalk my way
And a thousand violins begin to play
Or it might be the sound of your hello
That music I hear
I get misty the moment you’re nearYou can say that you’re leading me on
But it’s just what I want you to do
Don’t you notice how hoplessly I’m lost
That’s why I’m following you

On my own
Would I wander through this wonderland alone
Never knowing my right foot from my left
My hat from my glove
I’m too misty and too much in love
(repeat after music interlude)

Look at me

Vanilla Ice Cream

I write this as I drop by the Family Mart tucked between the humongous concrete slabs of buildings in 6750 and order a hot cup of coffee and vanilla ice cream…

Vanilla ice cream reminds me a lot of you,

not because you like it,

or not because you’re sweet…

It’s because our relationship is like vanilla ice cream,

it melted…

and became just vanilla mess.

Vanilla-Ice-Cream-Cone

I write this on a tissue paper I used to wipe the vanilla mess on the table and on my lips, it’s raining outside and my head is buzzing from too many vodka shots, am I even making sense now? Maybe not because I can’t make sense of the whole thing we have had. Because of you my writing is a mess, my academic life is defined (now) by my writing and you F it up.

Nice job.

Even my writing is a sticky white vanilla mess.

Bye Summer, Hello June!

I always liked June. June is the month that signals more work and a busier schedule for workaholics like myself. When I was younger, June meant new shoes, new bags, new notebooks, new books, new pencils and the smell of new plastic pencil box. Summer has officialy ended and the time has come again to get serious. I say a temporary farewell to my random trips to Baguio, Laguna, and other places here and there. I needed the whole summer to get away from it all, I felt like my head was exploding, overwhelmed of all life plans and deliverables that I have to meet before the year ends. I needed a vacay big time, so I got myself one even if it’s not a glamorous trip to the beaches of Bali or Phuket.

Here are a few highlights of summer 2013, just some vague updates about my life:

  • I booked a ticket for an Asian tour to Malaysia, Indonesia, Thailand and Singapore. (And I can tell I would be broke by the end of that trip from all the shopping, hotels, transpo and food)

 

  • I found my sport. People who know me would say that sports and I don’t get along, don’t go together or whatever hyperbole you could think of which would emphasize that I am not made for such endeavor. But I always win at badminton and the people at the sports center I play at commend me for my “natural skill”. I told my dad about it and he said I take the skills from my grandfather yet again. Runs in the blood, so it seems.

 

  • It turns out that I’m graduating from my masters March of next year, this was really a disappointment, but yet again, my profesors and colleagues have high expectations on my work for my MBA and MSPM degree as my CSR work should be a landmark study in the country since it is an unchartered territory of academic endeavor. Wish me luck on this still.

 

  • I really miss my mom’s cooking, the thought of another run to the restaurant, fast food or another microwaveable meal irks me.

 

  • I had a great summer with the company of my friends, I admit I was a pot head half of the time but I really got closer to them and I’m also happy to meet new friends and be re-acquainted with old ones. Slumber parties, long drives, watching movies, playing Deal or no Deal at the arcade and shouting at each other, karaoke nights, drinking in our places, clubbing, dining out, jaunts to the beach or just Manila bay and having coffee. It really made my summer.

 

  • I rested my mind, I withdrew from reading heavy stuff like academic books, review materials for the law entrance, Tolstoy, Wilde and Dostoevsky. I know, I know – it also meant I postponed a lot of work, but I really felt burned out. It was purely leisure reading this summer, I even stopped reading the newspapers. I read magazine after magazine and John Grisham, classics and Ayn Rand. Okay, I admit I cheated and read some Harvard Business Reviews and a few journals here and there but I feel amped up for the heavier stuff about to come this month!

 

  •  Retrospect. Yes sir. I listened to old CDs and songs, looked at old pictures and old photo albums, visited old places like Pizza Volante, Cubao Expo, got in touch with old friends and listened to a lot of old shool jazz songs and Dvorak.

 

  • New gadgets, thanks a lot to my dad who makes it an excuse that he has to “update”. Mom and I are showered with new gadgets that it’s already confusing to tell where you saved a particular file. The 3D TV, massage chair, exercise equipment and other metal gunk up to that weird LED tree dumped in a hallway in our house that still remained either underused or completely unused. Dad’s on a crazy spending spree.

 

  • I’m getting a hand of budgeting and doing adult stuff. I’m ready for bills coming up, household management (like making sure the water is full and there is bearable amounts of energy consumption), making sure the garbage is taken out once or twice a week and that shampoo bottles are full.

 

  • I didn’t write anything on my planner this summer. I was Little Miss Spontaneous but I’m done with that, I have to get it straight now, and live life healthier and like a straight arrow to go along with the sports and the gym membership. I don’t want to put it all to waste since it came from hard earned money.

 

  • I had my BMI and fitness check-up, it turns out I gained 9 kg from my slender 50kg. I have to put more time in the gym and with badminton it turns out. I blame fastfoods, microwave meals and soft drinks for the weight gain, really.3

 

  • I’ve developed an addiction for Thai Milk Tea in those big cans and Kimchi Flavored Korean Noodles. Dairy queen and spam sandwiches are still a constant.